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Sunday, November 30, 2014

Tomorrow is Captain Zero's last day in office


Fuck you and the horse you rode in on you smarmy Palin-abetting National Guard rape cover-upper.

I hope the door hits you on the ass on your way out tomorrow.

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Sorry Kirk Cameron I don't need you to save Christmas for me



From Kirk's Fecebook page:

Help me storm the gates of Rotten Tomatoes!

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/kirk_camerons_saving_christmas/

All of you who love Saving Christmas - go rate it at Rotten Tomatoes right now and send the message to all the critics that WE decide what movies we want our families to see! If 2,000 of you (out of almost 2 million on this page) take a minute to rate Saving Christmas, it will give the film a huge boost and more will see it as a result!

Thank you for all your help and support in putting the joy of Christ back in Christmas!

Thanks Kirk but I understand the meaning of Christmas in my own way.  Christmas has pagan roots which means it can be celebrated any which way.  I celebrate Christmas by remembering Jesus Christ and his birth while the person next to me may not..

Kirk may think he knows the meaning of Christmas but he doesn't.  Look at picture above.  What do you see, a Christmas tree which is a pagan symbol, presents, lights, and the cross is related to Easter.

Christmas wasn't even a national holiday until the Civil War.

And to think I wrote this guy a fan letter when I was 11 years old.

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

I thought Joe Junker and Bristol broke up

From Hoohah's Fecebook page

Check out the trailer for this great new documentary about one of the extreme sports that guys – and gals – enjoy in the Last Frontier where we know how to live life vibrantly outdoors, literally in our backyard. Bristol’s boyfriend Joey stars in this, and Willow has a cameo.

I thought Joey and Bristol broke up.  His name wasn't in the police report for the brawl I don't think and Bristol's "boyfriend" was allegedly there.

Turkey Award winners

Entertainment-The Palin family

Sports-Donald Sterling

Politics-Ted Cruz

Newsmakers-Vladmir Putin

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Hey Sarah Palin Rice will be at the Great Alaska Shoot Out!



Rice University that is.  Sorry to disappoint you Hooh-ah!

From RiceOwls.com

Rice University men’s basketball will face a tough national field at the 2014 GCI Great Alaska Shootout on Nov. 27-29 at the Alaska Airlines Center. Seven of the event’s 10 games will be televised nationally on CBS Sports Network.

The Owls open against 2014 Atlantic Sun Champion Mercer, which toppled Duke in a 14-over-3 seed upset in the opening round of the NCAA Tournament in March. That game is set for 8:30 p.m. CT on Nov. 27 on CBSSN.

From there, Rice will face either UC Santa Barbara or Washington State on Nov. 28 at either 5 or 11 p.m. CT in the semifinal or consolation round.

Awaiting Rice on Nov. 29 from the other side of the bracket will be host Alaska-Anchorage, Colorado State, Missouri State or Pacific.

CBS Sports Network will air both Friday semifinals as well as Saturday’s championship game at 10:30 p.m. CT.

The GCI Great Alaska Shootout is the longest-running regular-season college basketball tournament in the nation, taking place every Thanksgiving in Anchorage since 1978. This will be the inaugural tournament held at UAA’s brand-new, 5,000-seat Alaska Airlines Center.

Rice has never played in the Great Alaska Shootout, but has previously visited the state. The Owls claimed the 2003 BP Top of the World Classic in Fairbanks with double-figure wins over Idaho State, St. Mary’s and Washington State.

I'm rooting for Rice to win the tournament.

Monday, November 24, 2014

Wall Street Journal actually slams ole Sarah


From Wall Street Journal



Republicans for the most part avoided eating their own this election except in Alaska, where tea-party diva Sarah Palin helped the independent-Democratic ticket topple GOP Gov. Sean Parnell out of political spite.

The governor’s race in the Last Frontier State was a sleepy affair until September, when independent Bill Walker, who lost to Mr. Parnell in the 2010 GOP primary, merged campaigns with the Democratic nominee, Byron Mallott, a former mayor of Juneau. The unlikely duo, which share little in common politically besides rank opportunism, ran on a populist platform.

Mr. Walker criticized the governor’s plan for a 730-mile natural gas pipeline as “fatally flawed” and a giveaway to Big Oil. He and Mr. Mallott also backed an unsuccessful referendum this summer to repeal Mr. Parnell’s reform to the state’s progressive oil tax—Ms. Palin’s crowning achievement in office.

While governor, Ms. Palin jammed through a tax hike on oil profits as crude prices doubled between 2006 and 2008. Oil and natural-gas royalties and taxes account for roughly 90% of state coffers. Surging oil profits also helped prop up the state’s economy, personal incomes and tax revenues. While U.S. GDP plunged between 2006 and 2009, Alaska’s economy grew by a compounded annual 4.4%—the most nationwide.

Mr. Parnell, the former lieutenant governor, assumed office in July 2009 after Ms. Palin stepped down. The new governor inherited an economic crisis of Ms. Palin’s making. Oil profits subsequently plunged while drillers disembarked for Texas, Oklahoma and North Dakota. Alaska’s crude production has fallen by 20% since 2009.

Last year Alaska’s GDP contracted by 2.5%—the only state to record negative growth. The Republican governor sought to stabilize volatile revenues and stimulate investment by reforming Ms. Palin’s progressive oil tax. Ms. Palin responded by throwing her weight behind the August referendum.

A slim majority of voters rejected the ballot measure, yet the populist furies fueled Mr. Walker’s rise. Two weeks before the election, Ms. Palin formally endorsed the Walker-Mallott “Unity Ticket” on the pretext of encouraging political comity in Juneau. “This strong independent ticket represents an Alaskan-sized heart, putting people over party machine politics and Alaskans over egos,” she declared.

Ms. Palin is not overwhelmingly popular in her home state—a Public Policy Polling survey in August showed that just 36% of voters statewide view her favorably—but she does carry clout among anti-establishment conservatives. Given that the election appears to have been decided by fewer than 5,000 votes, and that Republican Dan Sullivan topped incumbent Democratic Sen. Mark Begich by nearly 8,000, Ms. Palin may very well be able to claim Mr. Parnell’s scalp.

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Sarah Palin not only hates America she also hates Americans


From MSNBC

The rules as applied to Sarah Palin haven’t changed. As we talked about over the summer, the former half-term governor of Alaska remains a deeply silly person whose opinions are not to be taken seriously. When news organizations routinely make a fuss about her random missives, they’re lending credence to a former officeholder who doesn’t deserve it.

But every now and then, one of Palin’s tirades stands out as newsworthy.

The right-wing personality released a new online video today, complaining about President Obama and immigration, offering the usual lines in a style that can charitably be compared to a teenager delivering a report about a book she hasn’t read (via Simon Maloy).

But then Palin added this:
“We’ll survive this president. The question is (overdramatic pause) can we survive the people who voted for him, twice?”
I don’t know, can we?

Look, I realize that Palin holds the president in contempt. It’s not entirely clear why, but she’s not an Obama fan. I get it.

But this struck me as interesting because Palin seems to be arguing that her most pressing concern about America’s future is the president that disgusts her; it’s Americans themselves.

For Palin, this may have been a throwaway line, which probably doesn’t deserve too much scrutiny, but 66 million Americans voted for Obama in 26 states. Only six presidents have ever earned more than 51% of the popular vote twice and Obama is one of them. The president took office thanks to the support of a big chunk of the American electorate.

In Palin’s mind, these people’s very existence puts the nation’s survival in jeopardy? The biggest threat to America’s future is Americans?

Sarah if you are reading this Americans voted for Obama TWICE because they are sick of Republican assholes like you, John McCain, Mitt Romney, and Paul Ryan.

Just because the Republicans kept control of the House and took the Senate doesn't mean they are sick of Obama.  BTW I question the integrity of the voting there as there were lots of reports of voter suppression.
Voters voted overwhelmingly for gay marriage, legalization of marijuana, and raising the minimum wage in several states.  Overall they like President Obama, problem is the Republican obstructionism is keeping him from doing what the voters want.

To quote anti-war activist Ron Kovic, if you don't love America, then get the hell out.  Well I love America.  So Sarah get the hell out!

Question for Todd and Sarah Palin





Sarah why have you not released Trig's birth certificate?

Todd have you ever been with or hung out with hookers in Anchorage?

Friday, November 21, 2014

STFU Sarah Palin!




You can watch her screech on her Fecebook page

It is perfectly ok for Ronald Reagan to give amnesty for millions of illegal immigrants, but President Obama can't?  Fuck you Hooh-Hah

Happy Belated Birthday Vice President Biden!


Uncle Joe's birthday was yesterday.

Happy Birthday Joe, it's a fucking deal!

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Desperately seeking Bristol Palin

Mugshot Picture taken from Immoral Minority

I'm not posting the link to Brancy's blog but I will post the gist of what she said here:

She blasts President Obama for his comments about working mothers, she claims she gets up every morning to go to work in Anchorage, come home, and take care of Tripp.

I call utter bullshit on that.

She has never had a job, DWTS, Life's a Tripp, Wife Swap, and grifting do not count.  If she is so broke how come she can afford to lose a $300 pair of sunglasses at a drunken party?

No employer would allow anyone to take that much time off to appear on TV.

And if she is such a great parent, why did she bring Tripp to that drunken brawl?


Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Looking for a great stocking stuffer for that Palin hater in your life or one for yourself?



Eric Thompson who was unjustly fired for speaking the truth about Sarah Palin is selling T-shirts and hoodies commemorating the 2014 Palin Brawl.  10% of the proceeds go to St. Jude's Children's Hospital.  You can order them here

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Sarah Palin forgot to pack extra clothes for Louisiana


YUCK!


I'm not shitting ya, that is exactly what she wore at the rally in Louisiana.  She looked, dressed, and acted like a whore.
Here is another one:


If I was Bill Cassidy I would be ashamed to let her on stage.

Then Hoohah wore the same outfit while dining with the Duck Dynasty klan:


Really why can't she dress nicely when out campaigning for someone, although I disagree completely with the following women, at least they are well groomed and have a sense of decorum and style:

Lisa Murkowski




Michele Bachmann

Nicki Haley









Monday, November 17, 2014

M Joseph Sheppard still living in La-La Land!

From Palin4President2016 blog

Preamble:

Hillary helped 24 Dem candidates this election; 14 lost. Sarah Palin helped 21; 19 won.

Brown lost for Governor despite strong support of the state’s Dem establishment & visits to Maryland by Obama, Michelle Obama, Bill &Hillary Clinton.
President Obama has lost nearly 70 seats in the House since taking office more seats in midterm elections than any president since Truman
**************************************************************
Governor Palin's Endorsed Winners List #1Senators Tim Scott Joni Ernst Ben Sasse Pat Roberts

Governors Pete Ricketts, Doug Ducey,Greg Abbott,
Congressman Barry Loudermilk, Elise Stefinak, Tom Emmer,Mia Love, Dave Brat

List #2 Attorney's General:Mark Brnovich Arizona/ Adam Laxalt Nevada Leslie Rutledge Arkansas/,Ken Paxton Texas

Palin's winners list #3
(TBC);Alaska Governor Bill Walker /Lt Governor Byron Mallett


Joe honey, may I call you Joe?

Here is a list of all of Sarah's losers:

Primaries 2014 - Total result so far:8 WON, 11 LOST

Greg Abbott, Texas (Governor) - WON(with no significant opposition)
Julianne Ortman, Minnesota (Senate) -DROPPED OUT (after GOP convention endorsed Mike McFadden)


Sunday, November 16, 2014

White trash on parade







With the exception of the two adorable children in the lower left hand corner and the 13 year old in the lower right hand corner, we have redneck, white trash parade here!

Saturday, November 15, 2014

The poll for the SPHASH Turkey Awards closes tonight

Just to let you all know the polls for the 2014 Turkey Awards closes tonight so if you haven't voted please do so.

How come Sarah Palin wasn't invited to Billy Graham's birthday party?


This sounds more like a eulogy than a birthday greeting.  Note the green leaves outside.  Billy was having some health issues this past year and word was he was in his final days but he recovered.

Note how the bible is brand new, you can tell by how the gold is still shiny on the pages and the cover looks new.

So how come the Grahams didn't invite Sarah and Todd to Billy's birthday party?  They were afraid it would turn into a brawl!

Friday, November 14, 2014

Why would Sarah Palin claim she would be in Louisiana on Saturday November 8?





Sarah Palin was on Hannity on Friday November 7 and she made this statement:

"Saturday I'll be in Louisiana, tonight I am very pleased to hear that at the College Inn in New Orleans we have a unity effort going on there right now with Colonel Rob Maness and his supporters, in that race against Mary Landrieu, joining with the..the winner of the GOP you know that open jungle primary that..uh..Louisiana has, we will see Cassidy and Maness, and their supporters come together to make sure that Mary Landrieu, and her participation in this lawlessness, these felled policies of Obama's, that they don't get back to Washington D.C.. We'll have the GOP there and we'll do that by unity. So I want to participate in things like that to help."

But it looks like she wasn't invited, but she is going to be doing this on this Saturday:

As Rep. Bill Cassidy wages a runoff campaign against Louisiana Democratic Sen. Mary Landrieu, he'll get some in-person support this weekend from Sarah Palin and "Duck Dynasty" star Phil Robertson.

Palin previously endorsed Cassidy's GOP primary opponent Rob Maness, but now that the race has narrowed to a contest between Cassidy and Landrieu, Palin will help shore up the GOP vote for Cassidy.

Palin and Robertson will attend a GOP unity rally for Cassidy on Saturday afternoon in Monroe, Cassidy's spokesman confirmed. The story was first reported by Politico.

Was Sarah in Louisiana all week, and if so why?






Thursday, November 13, 2014

Sarah Palin forgot John McCain pals around with terrorists



From Hoohah's Fecebook page

Good God, Mr. President. To partner with Iran is to trust the enemy, which is insane. Iran has complicity in the rise of ISIS as it supports radical militias and arms Islamic terrorists.

You've been the luckiest man in the world, in an un-American Democracy sort of way, to have had the liberal media in your lap allowing you to execute the least transparent presidency in history while they mock and destroy your critics for you. Until now. Even they must see that without accountability you are leading us into very, very dangerous territory.

In the 2008 campaign Sen. McCain and I warned, on behalf of every reasonable person, that your willingness to negotiate with terrorists would get Americans killed; that pulling an anti-Reagan move by taking our Big Stick of strength and putting it in the hands of any foe could be insurmountably devastating for our allies. Iran is one of Israel's staunchest enemies. Mr. President, who is advising you to come against Israel?

What is wrong with you, Barack Obama? You can not pal around with terrorists and expect us to survive.

- Sarah Palin

http://www.mccain.senate.gov/public/index.cfm/press-releases?ID=8e1edf21-359e-4c3d-835a-20fda69f5575

As you are all aware John McCain hung out with the terrorists from ISIS, something Sarah conveniently forgets.

This isn't the first time a POTUS has had a secret dialogue with another head of state.  In 1940 President Roosevelt and Winston Churchill were communicating back and forth in secret over potential US involvement in World War II.  At the time the US public was against in getting involved even though they were sympathetic to Great Britain.

Unknown to Roosevelt and Churchill, a cipher clerk at the US Embassy in London by the name of Tyler Kent was intercepting the dialogue between them and planned to give the evidence to Senator Gerald Nye who was a staunch anti-interventionist.  The evidence would have led to Roosevelt's impeachment and possible prison time.

However MI5 (Britain's version of Homeland Security) was watching Kent, when Kent was about to leave London with 2000 pages of documents, Churchill and Ambassador Joe Kennedy were alerted as what Kent was going to do.  Churchill ordered his arrest, Kennedy fired him and waived diplomatic immunity.

As history proved Roosevelt was correct in the fact that Germany was a threat to our democracy.  If MI5 waited 24 hours, Kent would have given the documents to Nye, Roosevelt would have been impeached or lose the 1940 election, Wendell Wilkie would have been the 33rd president and we would all be speaking Germanese.

There are things behind the scenes we as the public don't know about and perhaps it's better that is such.  President Obama has it all under control.  So STFU Hoohah!


Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Question about the Iron Dog and Todd Palin's participation




Since Todd Palin embarrassed himself at the brawl two months ago, will he be allowed to participate in the 2015 Iron Dog?  A lot of Iron Dog members were at the party so I'm sure he brought unwanted attention to the Iron Dog organization and sponsors.

I think the Iron Dog organization should permanently ban him.  He cheats anyway and last year quit at the beginning of it.

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Happy Veteran's Day!

This got such a positive response last year I am going to replay this song:


Happy Veterans Day to all the vets out there!  Thank you for your honorable service, with the exception of one who's actions on Sept 6, 2014 were less than honorable.

Monday, November 10, 2014

The Palin/Heath family has broken all of God's commandments



ONE: 'You shall have no other gods before Me.

The Palins worship money and Ronald Reagan

TWO: 'You shall not make for yourself a carved image--any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.

Sarah, Todd, and Bristol love being in the spotlight and relish being in the media.  Sarah also fancies herself as a Queen Esther

THREE: 'You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain.

I have never heard them say God**** but they take the name in the lord in vain by doing stupid things like saying the 2008 Election was God's will

FOUR: 'Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.

They haven't been to church in years!

FIVE: 'Honor your father and your mother.

Track fighting with his step father at the brawl.

SIX: 'You shall not murder.

Curtis Menard, Dar Miller, and the 254 seniors that died waiting to get health care in Alaska from the state.

SEVEN: 'You shall not commit adultery.

Curtis Menard, Brad Hanson, Shailey Tripp, Chuck Heath Jr's floozy now wife

EIGHT: 'You shall not steal.

Setting up a PAC to grift money


NINE: 'You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

Lying about President Obama, Levi, Sunny, and Sadie Johnston

TEN: 'You shall not covet your neighbor's house; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's.'

Again Curtis Menard

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Is Sarah Palin hoping Trig only makes it to 20?



From Hoohah's Fecebook page

Enjoy this beautiful greeting from father to son.

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/bristolpalin/2012/05/living-life-well-for-40-years-and-counting/

I read it again yesterday while waiting for Trig to awaken after eye surgery. So groggy from deep sleep at the hands of a skilled anesthesiologist, our son's surgeon also waited and reassured. And he told me the most fascinating thing about the eyes of a child with Down syndrome. "Compare his eyes to a 'normal' child's. Get a magnifying glass. Look deep. Their eyes are captivating inside! They're different, they're colorful, they sparkle. Surely God made these eyes to reflect what heaven must be."

If only we all could see into and through the eyes of the innocent! They're God's sons and daughters who may not meet man's standards of perfection but will certainly meet His. Their enduring childlike faith and their patience with the rest of us can teach us what is important. Maybe if we look with those eyes, what a wonderful world we will see.

- Sarah Palin

So many things wrong with this.

The average lifespan for a Down Syndrome person is between 55-60.  Not 40. and certainly not 20.  But the way Sarah has treated Trig, he may only make it to 20, which is probably what she really wants as she cannot stand the boy and is no longer of any use to her.

I am sure George Will, as much as I disagree with him, is a loving father who saw to it that Jon got therapy and good care so he could have a normal life, which is something Hoohah hasn't done with Trig.

Even though I have a belief in God, he doesn't not magically point at something and poof makes it better.  When I was growing up my grandma got this cross-stitch picture for Mother's Day  that said "God can't be everywhere so he invented mothers", she hung it in her kitchen.   Same thing here, God created doctors and therapists to take care of us here on earth.  If you disagree with me on that that's OK, but that is my take on it.  God put people on earth to do his work.

And for a little snark, look at the picture of Jon with Dumbya.  Even with Down Syndrome I am sure Jon is much more intelligent than Dumbya.  Sorry but I had to say it.

Saturday, November 8, 2014

SPHASH is more popular than the Sarah Palin Channel



From The Daily Beast



“Geez, Todd!” Sarah Palin shouts—fairly screeches, actually. “Geez, Todd!” she repeats, this time in a lower register. “You’re so lucky!”

The celebrated former Republican vice presidential nominee—who served as governor of Alaska for 19 months before quitting in the middle of her first term to make millions on the lecture and reality-show circuit—is barefoot on an outdoor basketball court at an unnamed desert resort. She’s wearing a purple T-shirt sporting a “john ‘08” logo in the middle of a fish-shaped symbol—a conflation of her two most important saviors and benefactors, Jesus Christ and Arizona Sen. John McCain.

And she’s getting beat, badly, by her First Dude in a game of HORSE.

Clearly, Palin’s “Sarah Barracuda” days—when she was sharp-elbowed Sarah Heath, point guard on the 1982 state championship-winning girls high school basketball team, the Wasilla Warriors—are very much behind her. On the other hand, unlike any other losing veep candidate in memory, she has managed to extend her 15 minutes of fame into six long years of monetizable stardom.

Her latest venture—for which Todd’s very ungallant hoop triumph is a featured attraction, at the tail-end of a video in which the ex-guv exalts the beauty of the desert landscape, “aggressive resource development,” and (in a burst of Palinesque verbiage) “this creation of God’s that we’ve been gifted with”—is thepaid-subscription, Web-based Sarah Palin Channel.

Three months after the launch, former CNN President Jonathan Klein—whose niche digital television company, TAPP, is backing the channel—claims it’s already turning a profit.

“It’s going really well,” Klein says, while declining to reveal how many Palin fans have signed up for $9.95 monthly or $99.95 yearly subscriptions. “She asked us from the very beginning never to talk about specific numbers, because for her she says it’s not about the numbers. It’s about the message and enabling her followers to all get together and talk freely. So I can’t give you numbers. I can tell you that she’s hit all our milestones and that she’s posting content constantly.”

The content, not surprisingly, will be easily lampoonable by the “liberal elite intellectuals” that the channel’s namesake frequently rails against. There’s a surfeit of paeans to Ronald Reagan; a countdown of “DAYS LEFT IN THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION”; a regular “ASK ME ANYTHING” video in which just-plain-Sarah fields personal and political questions from inquiring subscribers; a featured link to “Bristol’s Blog,” in which the oldest Palin daughter (and single mom) muses on everything from a biblically correct Adam-and-Everoutine on Dancing With the Stars to the treachery of Lena Dunham and the Hollywood lefties who empower it; and “SALLY’S WORD OF THE DAY,” chosen by Palin’s mother Sally Heath.

Thursday’s word was “judicious.” Presumably, Sally Heath’s future words of the day will not include “revigorated,” as in her daughter’s “ASK ME ANYTHING” answer to a subscriber who was interested in supporting a third political party. “Reagan didn’t believe in a third party when he was running,” Palin chirped. “He believed in a revigorated GOP.” (Also, not to be a pedant about it, but the ex-guv is flat wrong when she goes on to assert in the same answer that Reagan “first ran for president in 1976”; Palin’s research team, if any, should note: The year was 1968.)

Yet Palin—a former local news sports reporter and a current Fox News political commentator—is undeniably telegenic. Even when she’s saying things that are arguably tendentious and counterfactual (a diplomatic way of describing what her elite detractors might simply call “silly lies”), the ex-guv is blessed with a sunny, accessible, larger-than-life persona that jumps out of the screen, grabs you by throat—and squeezes.

“She’s a very unpretentious person,” Klein says. “There aren’t a lot of layers of staff and security. She’s a very everyday kind of American person. So she’s doing this because she finds this an easy and fun way to communicate.”

The goal, Klein says, is to try to replicate, or at least approach, the astonishing success of former Fox News personality Glenn Beck, whose subscription-based Web TV operation, TheBlaze.com reportedly boasts hundreds of thousands of paying customers and is said to be minting money.

Yet while it’s impossible to know, absent hard figures, whether the Sarah Palin Channel is succeeding in attracting an audience, it’s significant that the channel’s Web traffic, expressed in terms of unique visitors, is a tiny fraction of The Blaze’s 15.3 million in September (the most recent available numbers from Media Trend). The Sarah Palin Channel, by contrast, had a barely measurable 36,000 visitors in September, according to Quantcast.

The channel's social-media profile might be equally anemic--for instance two followers on an account for SarahPalinTV as of Thursday night. After initially saying he wasn't sure, Klein said that account is not connected with the channel, calling it "a fake account [with] no content in it."

Klein argues that such an account would be superfluous in any case since Palin herself enjoys a combined five million followers on Twitter and Facebook—and that is the main avenue by which potential subscribers are lured. "Her channel is not affected by this kind of thing in the slightest because it's targeted at her community, which is already following her," Klein says, adding that @SarahPalinUSA, Palin's personal Twitter account, "is the only one we post content to."

Another issue is that TAPP failed to purchase several similar Internet addresses, or URLs, that currently are being used to skewer and mock the Sarah Palin Channel. A Facebook page purporting to represent TheSarahPalinChannel.org features a profile pic of the ex-guv with the headline, “I’m with stupid.” Meanwhile,TheSarahPalinChannel.com links to various episodes of The Colbert Reportmaking fun of Klein’s star.

Klein says that while TAPP bought a number of Palin Channel-like Web addresses, “URLs aren’t nearly as important as they used to be, because most people don’t come directly to a channel by typing its name into a browser anymore. They get there via links, especially from social media. We focus on pushing a lot of content out to Governor Palin’s social-media followers, which they can then click to be taken to the channel.”

Klein—whose partner in TAPP is another kingpin of the “lamestream media” that Palin loves to deride, former NBC Universal Television Entertainment Chairman Jeff Gaspin—claims his star is cutting through the clutter.

“A couple of weeks ago, somebody came up to her and said, ‘Oh my God! You blew me away because you responded to my comment on the channel by name! I’ll never forget that!’ So it’s had that kind of effect on her biggest supporters.”

Right now my blog averaging about 41,000 visitors a month, over 1,000/day.  And i don't even charge people to read it.  Take that Hoohah!

Despite Republican victories on Saturday, the voters still favor Democratic policies

After Tuesday's election I took a little time reflecting on the Democrats losing the Senate and several House seats.

This really isn't a Republican victory, it's more of an indictment against President Obama.  People actually support liberal polices, like raising the minimum wage, legalization of pot, affordable health care, and gay marriage.  If the Republicans ignore that it would be a huge mistake.

Look at Joni Ernst, she is already slipping up, revealing her agenda

Also people do not want to go through an impeachment.  The Republican establishment knows it but the Teabaggers like Ernst and Cruz want to push it.  And Sarah Palin is their lead cheerleader for it but everyone just laughs at her.
.
I can't understand why people hate President Obama so much.  Since he has been president, the unemployment rate has shrunk nearly in half, the deficit has been shrinking, we are out of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, bin Laden is sleeping with the fishes, and health insurance is cheaper thanks to the ACA,   I guess the skin color blinds you.

The best thing for the Democrats to do is to keep working harder and highlight the successes of President Obama.  And get behind Hillary Clinton as well.  I wish there was a Democratic younger candidate but Hillary is the Dems only viable choice.  Elizabeth Warren is smart but not enough experience, Andrew Cuomo is a governor but his ugly divorce from a Kennedy and the Moreland Commission scandal could cause problems.

Last but not least at least the Democrats are not acting like this bitch:  (NSFW)


Friday, November 7, 2014

Hypocritical Sarah Palin



From Hoo-hah's Fecebook page

Thank you, wise voters! Tonight is a big victory for We the People! Credit is due to the victorious candidates. Your message to President Obama is undeniably received, though he'll try to ignore it.

Now, new Republican Congressional majority in the House and Senate, please realize that Americans were not necessarily voting FOR any party; they were voting AGAINST the continued dysfunction and corruption in D.C. We the People were saying, “enough is enough” to the scandals, crony capitalism, and utter lack of leadership in Washington.

The Democrats got mauled today, deservedly so. To prohibit that from happening to the GOP in 2016, it must learn the lesson from the last time Republicans held the Senate majority. This time they must not retreat, and it's our responsibility to hold them accountable. Will they fight for reform that aligns with the limited government planks of the Republican platform, or will they return to the big government cronyism and status quo favored by the permanent political class? Will they drain the swamp or decide the D.C. cesspool is really just a jacuzzi they can't wait to jump on into and shake us off?

If GOP leadership returns to business as usual, then this majority will be short lived, for We the People say, “once bitten, twice shy.”

So, establishment types, remember that you didn’t build this! This majority that swept you into power tonight is thanks to the rank and file commonsense conservative grassroots. That’s who built it. And they expect results. They deserve the best for America.

Thank you, SarahPAC supporters. Congratulations, USA! God, please bless our future.


As you can read Sarah is rubbing it in.  Didn't she whine about sore winners last spring when one of her endorsees went down?

Why yes she did.

From SPHASH back on May 8, 2014

And Sarah I wouldn't brag too much, Sean Parnell could still lose, yes you didn't endorse him but he is still your butt boy.

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Sarah Palin claims to be a working mom. Not so fast sweetie



From Hoo-hah's Fecebook page

Obama Declares Stay-at-Home Moms Aren't Worth a Hill of Beans; Says It's a Choice 'We Don't Want Americans to Make’

Well that just takes the cake. Sure, Obama's latest shot across the bow in his own “War on Women" is easily deflected by women like my friends and me testifying to the most precious, irreplaceable seasons of our lives when we were BLESSED to be "stay-at-home moms" (though I don't remember any of us actually "staying home" in those busiest times of our children's lives), but Friday's jab deserves something right back nonetheless. On behalf of former and current stay-at-homers, including my girlfriends who still get together to bake cookies for the bake sale (see photos in my kitchen above), and volunteer to coach kids ball teams, and man the church's food bank, and entertain latchkey kids, and all that other obnoxiously "housewifey" stuff, the President needs to be spanked.

Barack, do you not know any stay-at-home moms? Are you and Michelle so disconnected from the real world that you think women will accept your intolerant view that we should not have a choice in how we wish to live our lives? You have a way of arrogantly demanding that we fall in line with your sad opinion of today's American woman. It seems you'd shackle us by your snobbish shunning of one traditional lifestyle choice while taking advantage of power to manifest your liberal view by manipulating public opinion and resources to diminish moms who put career on hold to raise a family. You are really messed up. And you're so 1960's.

Yes, the 60's are calling and they want their ardent yet narrow sexist confines back. See, you just set the women's movement back a few decades, and I think it's hilarious because for being the smartest man in the room, you ain't too smart.

Do you even understand that many stay-at-home moms also run businesses out of the home? Welcome to modern technology where you don't have to go to a physical office to work. You can run a business from a laptop these days!

You've repeatedly suggested that women aren't capable or responsible – starting, for example, with your classic "punished with a baby" offensive declaration in the '08 campaign. Add your attempts to convince America that only guys in government should control birth control – since free women aren't capable in a free market of walking down the drug store aisle to find it ourselves. Add, too, your shameless silence on the deplorable human rights violations in countries you'd befriend even though women are treated mercilessly there. Seriously, not a peep from atop your soapbox about the common practice of radical Islamist men going all jihad, literally, on females who'd dare cross their male "masters"? And in that creepy way you prioritize your time and our resources, instead of using your Nobel peacenik creds to influence the misogynist crazies in some of these Islamic death cults, you're out playing hoops... with the guys. Oh, also add your good ol' boys club (aka the White House) that still pays women less than men, and I'll stop with the nonstop examples.

You really are stuck in a contorted kind of '60s feminism where you obviously don't trust women to make their own decisions, so you're frustrated. Despite your view – and policies – that government must lord over women, in keeping with radical liberalism, you have to fake support for our equal rights; so you do it in a militant sort of way to compensate for your confusion. On pretending to know what's best for us you've got nothing but a silent scream demanding, "Hear me roar." Your stubbornness and the Obama priorities prove this. While Michelle's busy telling "incapable" stay-at-home moms what to feed their kids (hey, if you don't know how to feed your kids, maybe you shouldn't be having kids) you're busy broadcasting that hypocritical misogynist view that women really shouldn't have a choice in what we want to do in life, and you're administering anti-growth, debt-inducing policies that crush young women's future opportunities.

Now, I'm sure your star struck female minions in the media will writhe and wiggle in defense of you on this, they always do, even though you just marginalized a most valuable sector of American society while having the gall to admit that, for you, it's only all about the money. Work at home or not? It's not about kids or quality of life or personal opinion. You said homemakers will be paid less than women working outside the home (well, duh), "... and that’s not a choice we want Americans to make.”

Why not, Barack? What's to fear from letting go of some control you'd want over the women of America and trusting us just a wee bit to make a personal child-rearing choice, despite your disclosure that in your infinite wisdom you conclude staying home just "isn't a choice we want Americans to make." Isn’t it every woman’s right to choose to make a sacrificial decision to put careers temporarily on hold to raise their kids how they see fit?

Besides you proving the liberal double-standard in regards to choice and sexism, you demean some of the hardest working women on the planet. Perhaps you never witnessed the benefits a "full-time mom" provides a family, a community, our schools, our nation, but you're a big boy now so figure it out yourself without me lecturing you on the beauty of a homemaker. Suffice it to say "stay-at-home moms" make the world go 'round.


- Sarah Palin




Biologically Sarah is a mother but that's it. She doesn't work, and she never parents her children. Look at how the adult ones turned out and the youngest are totally ignored.

Oh and Sarah Stanley Ann Dunham Obama Soreto was a much better mother than Sally Shereen Heath!

And how dare you call President Obama "Barack" That's President Obama to you bitch. And those women with you in that pic, are they realy your friends or on the GriftPac payroll?

Happy Birthday Shailey!

Hope you have a great day!

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Yes this is really going to help reduce abortions

From Huffington Post



An Arizona school district is making sure that students are not educated about abortion in biology class.

This week, Gilbert Public Schools’ governing board voted to remove pages from an honors biology textbook because the pages talk about mifepristone, a pill that can induce an abortion, reports local outlet 12 News. Members of the board contended that the pages violate a state statute, which prevents school districts from providing instruction that "that does not give preference, encouragement and support to childbirth and adoption as preferred options to elective abortion," says the outlet.

The specific section in question is titled “Contraception can prevent unwanted pregnancy.” It says that “complete abstinence (avoiding intercourse) is the only totally effective method of birth control, but other methods are effective to varying degrees.” The passage, from the seventh edition of Campbell Biology: Concepts and Connections, goes on to describe the morning-after pill and mifepristone.

The issue was first brought to the board’s attention after the conservative Christian organization, Alliance Defending Freedom, wrote a letter to the district’s superintendent in August, saying that the textbook violates state regulations, reports the outlet. The board voted 3-2 to redact the pages in question, although it is unclear whether the district will remove the specific pages or blacken unwanted passages, says local outlet KTVK-3TV.

Notably, the Arizona Department of Education previously reviewed the textbook and said it was not violating the state statute. An attorney for the district said the same, reports local outlet the East Valley Tribune. As a result, one of the board members who voted against changing the textbook, Lily Tram, called the move an example of censorship.

The other board member who voted against changing the textbook, Jill Humpherys, said she thought the text “discussed biological principles well and in a very understandable way,” according to KTVK-3TV.

"If we hand a biology book to ninth-grade students with a page missing, I think there's going to be some questions about why that page is removed," Humpherys said to the outlet.

Still, another board member, Julie Smith, told the East Valley Tribune, “We are running the risk of being sued for being out of compliance with the law.”

I wonder how many abortions will actually result from this.  To quote the Florida troll SMH.

Sarah Palin sticks up for a thug



From Hoo-hah's Fecebook page:

What wonderful news that Marine Sgt. Andrew Tahmooressi will be free on U.S. soil—finally!—after being imprisoned in Mexico for the past eight months. It's been such a bizarre situation and so disappointing as we hear reports that the White House never did fight for our Marine's freedom. If true, then President Obama once again broke that sacred commitment to never leave an American behind. If I'm wrong on this, I'll be more than happy to acknowledge the President's efforts to see an honored vet set free. Prayers and well wishes go out to Sgt. Tahmooressi and all who have been so dedicated to his plight, especially Andrew's joy-filled mother today. I had the honor of speaking with her a few months ago and have admired her commitment in seeking justice for her son. She’s fought doggedly for Andrew's release; her efforts paid off. Great volunteer organizations worked so hard for this outcome, and FOX News’ Greta Van Susteren kept this important story of seemingly obvious injustice in the news even when few others reported on it. I hope the press will keep pursuing truth in the matter, in the name of justice for all. The best of everything, Andrew! Find peace and fulfillment in this new chapter of life!

I should have included Andrew Tahmooressi in my Turkey of the Year candidates.  I honestly believe Andrew was in Mexico with not the best intentions, PTSD or not.  He had a bunch of guns in his truck and crossed the border illegally the first time.  

Sarah defends Andrew the thug and slams President Obama for not doing more, yet slams him again over helping Bowe Bergdahl who was held by the Taliban for years and may have been bullied into going AWOL since he did not fit in.

Ole Hoo-hah loves scum.

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

To take our minds off the election for a bit, here is some comedy by Sarah Palin!


Election Day today, for the love of God go vote!

This is also the 6th anniversary of President Obama's election.  Hopefully the Dems will be just as victorious as they were six years ago.

And do not be intimidated by Republican tactics to keep voters at home, as low voter turnout results in Republican victories:

In Iowa the GOP is threatening to release a list of who voted Republican.

In Buffalo County South Dakota  the auditor is refusing to open up more early voting offices so Native Americans can vote and not making a long roundtrip..  Buffalo County is part of the Crow Creek Indian Reservation.

In Virginia, Georgia, and Washington state voters with the last names of Jackson, Garcia, Patel, and Kim are being purged from voter rolls.

Your vote matters, GO VOTE!


Monday, November 3, 2014

Louie Ghomert at it again

From Wonkette

Texas congressmollusk Louie Gohmert, that irrepressible imp, has been giving a lot of thought to Our Troops and how Barack Obama is trying to kill them all by making them fight the Ebolese Liberation Army.

On some strange Christian radio talk show this week, Gohmert was crying about the lack of full-body protective suits for military personnel building hospitals in Liberia, calling it “absolutely insane” that they wouldn’t be in full-body condoms eve though they’d be handling 2X4s, not sick patients. And yes, he managed to drag in just about every possible paranoid talking point, even predicting that soldiers would be abandoned to Ebola and “treated like the Benghazi folks were” because the Obama administration won’t give them adequate protection. Who ordered the troops to stand down against Ebola?

Then, somehow, after a caller’s question about Obama’s disdain for the military, Gohmert veered off into some musings about the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” maybe because he sees gay people as a deadly infection. And Louie Gohmert wants you to know that he thought long and hard about all those homos in the military and has concluded that history proves why it’s a bad idea:

I’ve had people say, “Hey, you know, there’s nothing wrong with gays in the military. Look at the Greeks.” Well, you know, they did have people come along who they loved that was the same sex and would give them massages before they went into battle. But you know what, it’s a different kind of fighting, it’s a different kind of war and if you’re sitting around getting massages all day ready to go into a big, planned battle, then you’re not going to last very long. It’s guerrilla fighting. You are going to be ultimately vulnerable to terrorism and if that’s what you start doing in the military like the Greeks did … as people have said, “Louie, you have got to understand, you don’t even know your history.’ Oh yes I do. I know exactly. It’s not a good idea.”

That’s some pretty S-M-R-T historical analysis there, Mr. Gohmert, and thank god you have that important contribution. War has indeed changed since the days of the ancient Greeks, and we should definitely not let all these gay soldiers get gay massages of their huge taut muscles by lithe servant boys all day. It’s just not a good idea! Also, damn that Obama and his outmoded insistence on bronze helmets and phalanx battle formations, too.

Sadly, the show moved on to the next caller before Gohmert could condemn Obama for not outfitting our war-galleys with more powerful, muscular slaves to man the oars. Also, Benghazi.


Unfortunately Louie will be re-elected because he is in the Big Sandy TX district.  Big Sandy is home to ATI, the cult that Bill Gorthard founded and the Duggars are part of.


Two months have now since passed since the Brawl and John McCain weighs in



Is Korey Klingenmeyer going to press charges or not?

John McCain makes his first public remarks on the Brawl, from Talking Points Memo

Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) came to the defense of his former running mate, Sarah Palin, on Friday, more than a month after she and her family were involved in a drunken, bloody altercation at a house party in Alaska.

During an interview with Phoenix television station KTVK, the 2008 Republican presidential nominee said he wasn't excusing the brawl but went on to blast the media's coverage of it.

"I think these family affairs are -- I don't know much of the details about it," McCain told the TV station. "Things happen in people's families and I'm not excusing it, I'm not condemning it."

The brawl occurred in September at a house party in Anchorage that was attended by Palin and several members of her family. Witnesses and a police report on the incident said Palin's husband and some of their adult children ended up physically fighting with other party guests. The former vice presidential nominee, meanwhile, was seen yelling profanities during the melee, according to at least one account.

Palin has since called the incident "humiliating," although she and her daughter have criticized the news coverage of it.

McCain echoed that criticism on Friday.

"I just know that the kind of coverage that this got, in my view, is in keeping with the kind of coverage the liberals have accorded to Sarah Palin for a number of years, which in my view, is biased and unfair and sometimes unacceptable," McCain told KTVK.

Of course John is going to be diplomatic about it.  Hoo-hah knows all his secrets.  I'm sure Cindy and Meghan McCain had a good raucous laugh over the brawl however.

And yes John things are going to happen in families.  Did you ever get in a drunken brawl with your dad and brother.  I bet so, I hear John "Jack" McCain Jr. was quite the drunken sailor.

You know I did have some sympathy for John once, back in 2000 when Karl Rove with the blessing of Dumbya spread a nasty lie about John and Cindy's adopted daughter Bridget being John's illegitimate daughter with a prostitute.  That sympathy died when he sold his soul for Sarah Palin.

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Scott Brown doesn't know shit from shinola New Hampshire

From Raw Story

Former Massachusetts Sen. Scott Brown (R) showed an apparent lack of familiarity with at least one New Hampshire county during his final debate with incumbent Sen. Jeanne Shaheen (D-NH) on Thursday night.

“Let’s go to the western part of the state and talk about Sullivan County,” WMUR-TV political director James Pindell said to Brown. “Senator Brown, what do you see going right in the economy in Sullivan County, and what’s going wrong? And please be specific.”

Brown appeared to ignore the final part of Pindell’s question.

“On the southern border, we have more jobs, we have more opportunity,” Brown said. “Infrastructure and other opportunities up north are more difficult. But one of the biggest opportunities is tourism. One of the biggest opportunities are our ski areas and trails for snowmobiles. I support those efforts.”

Brown then drew the Affordable Care Act, aka Obamacare, into his answer, calling it the “biggest wet blanket” on the area’s economy. He added a complaint about the “highest corporate tax rates in the industrialized world” when Pindell stopped him.

“We’re talking about Sullivan County,” Pindell said. “I think you were talking about the North country.”

“I’m talking about any place past Concord, actually, and the challenges of our state,” Brown countered. “So I’m referring to the challenges including a high corporate tax rate, Obamacare coming in after the election, high electric costs. If you go to any county, those are very real challenges.”

“Sullivan County is west of Concord, it’s not north of Concord, Senator Brown,” Pindell responded. “So what do you see going well there? What’s not going well?”

“With respect, I’ve answered the question,” Brown told him. “The challenges are the same in every county in our state.”

Shaheen’s party posted footage of Brown’s remarks, which can be seen below.

Yes Scott Brown is someone we want in the Senate.  NOT!

4th annual Turkey Award nominations

I have posted polls towards the bottom of this blog for you to participate in.  Voting ends November 16 at 12:01 AM.  Please vote!

Politics:

Chris Christie

Ted Cruz

Joni Ernst

Chris McDaniel

Newsmakers:

Valdimir Putin

Oscar Pistouris

Boko Haram

ISIS

Entertainment:

Justin Bieber

Miley Cyrus

The Palin family

Stephen Collins

Sports:

Ray Rice

Adrian Peterson

Roger Goodell

Donald Sterling

Johnny Manziel




Saturday, November 1, 2014

Where did Sarah Palin get $100,000 in 2009?

From Alaska Dispatch News



Palin’s endorsement, announced Oct. 22, prompted the Alaska Federation of Republican Women, representing 600 women across the state, to publicize a letter comparing Walker to Palin.

The organization had supported Palin during her bid for governor in 2006, even raising about $100,000 for her campaign, said president Rhonda Boyles. But Palin turned her back on the Republican Party.

“She wasn’t very principled in how she dealt with the Republican Party,” Boyles said. “She went on that ticket but she was never part of the Republican establishment and in fact worked against that.”

When Palin left office, she had about $100,000 in her bank account that she could have given to a political entity such as the Republican women’s group. Instead, she gave it to the Mat-Su hospital where she gave birth to Trigg, Boyles said.

“There are a lot of disgruntled women in the state because of that,” Boyles said, adding that support for publishing the commentary was unanimous among the 20 board members who attended a statewide teleconference meeting. “Even if it was just $5,000, it would have been a statement saying 'Thank you for helping elect me.' ”


This stinks to high heaven in two ways, one she was not as broke as she said she was, and two it went to Mat-Su. Bribe perhaps?

Another Duggar gets married today and Raw Story tells it like it is





From Raw Story





As you are probably aware a member of America’s Royal Family is getting married this week.


No, not a Kardashian.


I am, of course, talking about the Duggar family whose television reality show is about a nice Christian broodmare lady who gives birth to lots and lots of babies while everyone stands around and “ooohs” and “ahhs” about the miracle of creating life, and which is apparently such a rare and fascinating talent that America is entranced. Also, the show features God, although he never makes an appearance. He’s like Charlie inCharlie’s Angels, except he never calls which creates dramatic tension: Will he do a cameo appearance this week? Tune in to find out!


This Saturday, way down Arkansas way where real America is living in sin with Walmart, young Jessa Duggar will wed even younger Ben Seewald and they will immediately get to humpin’ so that Jessa can begin to poop out a passel of Jesus babies for the Greater Glory of God — just like her mama did, making nineteen kids in her 47 years. The wedding is expected to go off without a hitch, providing a sloppy-drunk and weeping Bristol Palin doesn’t crash it while wearing a camouflage wedding dress and screaming that SHE is the one who should be getting reality-show-married, before picking a fight with one of the other Duggar kids.


Besides sharing their wedding invitation online, the young couple have made their wedding registry available to the general public. So, if you’re felling gifty and want this lovely couple (crock pot!) to get off on the right foot (crock pot!) you can send them a gift (crock pot!). Like a crock pot.


Before we get to the registry, a few facts about the couple.


The 21-year-old bride is Jessa, who should not be confused with one of her eight J-named sisters: Jill, Jana, Jennifer, Jheri-Curl, Jolene-Jolene-Jolene-Jolene, Jejune, Joystick, and .gif (pronounced ‘Jif’).


The groom is Ben Seebold whose is nineteen (marrying an older woman because ‘they know things’ according to Time magazine) and is described as a “college student,” although they admit he is only taking online courses which means “not really a college student” in our book. Ben is from Hot Springs, and the Duggars are allowing him tolive in their guest house until he makes an honest woman out of Jessa. According to patriarch and head semen dispenser Jim Bob Duggar, Ben pays for his keep by doing chores around the Duggar estate; mowing lawns, cleaning out rain gutters, and we assume ‘bustin’up a chiffarobe’ for Mayella Ewell down the road apiece.


The betrothed couple are heavily chaperoned and never even held hands until Ben “put a ring on it,” as feminist icon BeyoncĂ© would say. Prior to that, affectionate touching was limited to — and I am not making this shit up — “sidehugs,” which is that thing you do when you put your arm around another person and pull them into your side, — unlike a real hug where junk-bumping could accidentally happen leading to tingly impure unGodly thoughts. Also probably anal.


When Jessa and Ben kiss at the conclusion of their wedding ceremony it will be their first kiss. Awwww. No tongues, kids, God and family are watching.


Needless to say, when they finally slip away for their first fumbling “so that’s what it looks like…well, okay I’m going in” sexual encounter, it will also be a first. Unless, of course (NSFW).


That really that is about all you need to know about them before selecting a gift.


Which brings us back to the wedding registry which is loaded with exactly the type of mundane household items (crock pot!) that would be needed by a young couple who never shacked up and had hot nasty sex on a futon in a small sparsely-furnished apartment with like, three plates and a some glasses stolen from a bar. Not that I know anyone who started out that way. Nope.


In accordance with Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, food is prominently featured with requests for gift cards for Applebee’s, Red Robin, Buffalo Wild Wings, Panera, Coldstone Creamery, TGIFridays, Chili’s, Papa John’s, Subway, Cracker Barrel (of course), Outback, Burger King, and Domino’s Pizza. Fancy.


Which isn’t to say that Jessa (or Ben because we are NOT sexist!) won’t be doing much cooking because, along with an extensive array of kitchen implements and devices, they also asked for the below item in what I can only interpret as a specific anddeliberate attempt to troll me:


Wants FOUR of them. Ha-ha , you guys.


Since their requests are heavy on the practical (crock pots are nice) and light on the fun or interesting, I have a few suggestions that are outside the box because I am a thoughtful person and great gift-giver.


To start off…
The Very Best of Foreigner
The Very Best of Foreigner
The Very Best of Foreigner – On their wedding night Ben could cue up the first song ‘Feels Like The First Time‘ before their ‘first time.’ Providing Ben hasn’t been treating his body as if it was Dave & Busters, it is very likely he will finish with Jessa before the organ intro is over. ‘Waiting For A Girl Like You‘ will be nice for cuddling later in the afterglow of Jessa’s disappointment.
TGWWT
The God Who Wasn’t There – For even later that night when Ben is sleeping — having successfully ‘launched’ — and Jessa starts to have doubts about a lot of things.
clearancetebow
Emergency Back-up Messiah Action Figure – The real one is available too. Cheaper than you may think. Also a virgin.
L-Word-Box-Set
T

he L Word box set-


FADE IN


INT. Bedroom – Lit by television set.


Jessa and Ben are in bed under a comforter purchased at Bed, Bath, & Beyond. They lay stiffly next to each other, not touching. An episode of the L Word can be seen on the TV.


JESSA (V.O)
I’ve made a terrible mistake. I just wanted to make my parents happy…Ooo, that looks like fun. How do I get out of this? Will God hate me?


The same God that put that fine ass on Jenny? If only I had listened to my heart. Oh wow, Marina, you go girl…


BEN (V.O.)
Hawt.


(pause)


Whoops, I did it again.
3D- Fetus in a cube
3D- Fetus in a cube


3-Dimensional Fetus in a cube -


Created by Japanese engineering company Fasotec, the tiny baby cube thing called “Shape of an Angel” is a custom replica of a fetus. Expecting mothers can get an MRI image taken of their baby that gets sent to a 3D printer to create the replica. Each printout comes in a delicate jewelry box and measures about 3.5 inches tall.


With enough babies, these could be used to play checkers.


And most importantly:
bulkcondoms


Bulk quantity of condoms – In the long run, this one is actually for us, because we really don’t need a world filled with more pasty-white repressed anti-science homophobic god-botherers.


We have enough of those already and they are as common as unused wedding gift crock pots…


Happy marriage, you crazy kids!


This was the best article I had read about the upcoming nuptials. And yes the part about the excessive wedding registry is true. I think asking for restaurant gift cards is tacky.


At least Bessa are allowed to side hug, unlike the Maxwell family, friends of theirs.